One good friend, he walks into a bar
He asks the air how his friendships fell apart
He searches for answers in his coke and his rum
But the punchline never comes, it never comes
No, the punchline never comes, it never comes

The bartender asks “why the long face?”
Our rum and coke friend won’t reply
There’s a setup that he sees in these two empty seats
But the punchline never comes until you die
No, the punchline never comes until you die

One good friend, he walks into a bar
He tries to find why his life’s become so hard
But his margarita’s harboring a trick to get him numb
So the punchline never comes, it never comes
No, the punchline never comes, it never comes

The bartender asks “why the long face?”
They drink to all that he’s lost
There’s a setup in the distance from where his friend is sittin’
But the punchline never come without a cost
But the punchline never comes without a cost

One good friend, he walks into a bar
Hard enough that it leaves a nasty scar
He asks his lemonade why he’s feeling so dumb
But the punchline never comes, it never comes
No the punchline never comes, it never comes

The bartender asks “why the long face?”
Lemonade smiles and denies
The setup is the bridge between what he says and what he means
But the punchline always lies, it always lies
Yeah, the punchline always lies, it always lies

One young blonde is questioning her smarts
The priest and the rabbi have forgotten their parts
The noble gas, unsure how to react, twiddles its thumbs
But the punchline never comes, it never comes
No, the punchline never comes, it never comes

The comedian’s a little racist in a room of rainbow faces
Rum and Coke can’t help but slump
The comedian says you’re sensitive, you don’t get the messages
But the message never comes, it never comes
No, the message never comes, it never comes

“It’s no big deal,” he says, “I get this all the time”
But finds his shoulders slouching the remainder of the night
The honesty you thought you cried only brought one thing to light
Your speech may be free, but it doesn’t make it right
Your speech may be free, but it doesn’t make it right

Two old friends sit by Rum and Coke’s side
Three filled seats, just like old times
They’ve already told all the jokes that they know
But these punchlines are their own, they are their own
Yeah these punchlines are their own, they are their own

Did you hear the one about the stuffy ventriloquist?
I heard he had a stick up his ass
Did you hear the one about the pretentious actor?
His iron so ironic, he was fake as plastic
Did you hear the one about the fascist DJ?
He turned the tables on the revolutions
Did you hear the one about the distant friends?
He never wanted to lose them
We never wanted to lose them

I just want to see you
I just want for you to see me too (x a bunch)

SO NOW WE’RE

Three best friends playing music in a bar
Sharing a song about how we got this far
The blonde starts to jam ‘cause she heard she passed the bar exam
The priest and the rabbi celebrate over a drink or nine
The noble gas reacts with unabashed laughter

I’ll be there to share a song and
I’ll be there to sing along and
When the setup hurts like hell
We’ll write this punchline for ourselves! (x a bunch)

One last call, they’re closing up the bar
Tip your servers, they’re working really hard
Thank you all for being here, we’re glad that you could come
‘Cause we for one had fun, it’s always fun
We for one had fun, it’s always fun